The ‘spineless’ swine flu…

The other day, I came across a funny anecdote on a rather serious thing called ‘swine flu’, very smartly put as ‘Pigs flew’ on some cool, crazy Tees (Well, that’s fashion, you see!). Anyhow, it goes like this – there’s this man who is apparently hit hard by the hullabaloo over swine flu epidemic. So, obviously he wears a mask day and night, and visits his doctor almost everyday. But instead of flu, he complains of breathing trouble, and says he can’t kiss his girlfriend. So doc advises him to get rid of that mask!
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Goes without saying that wearing a mask is undoubtedly one of the best options we have to keep ourselves protected. But don’t you start feeling as if you already suffer from the disease once you put it on? It feels kind of weird, doesn’t it? I mean, the idea of hiding behind the mask and talking to the boss sounds odd! But then quite conveniently you can say something and not emote it.
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But wearing a mask is definitely better than suffering through the repeated sneezes of someone sitting right next to you.
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During the ‘no swine flu’ times, you could have perhaps sympathised with the person who’s sneezing, coughing, and has fever at the workplace, but all you must be wanting to do in such a situation these days, is conveying the supposedly heartless feelings boldly: STOP IT and GET OUT! (As it is we aren’t quite fond of our colleagues, are we?). But gets a little difficult in case of a friend… may be then you are left with the only option of convincing yourself that he’s probably sneezing thanks to the aircon!
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Talking about workplace, it isn’t hard to believe that the idea of swine flu strikes your fellows harder on a Monday than on any other day of the week. The ‘I am unwell, can’t come, have to go for swine flu check’ text from a co-worker has become as regular a <i>bahana</i> as viral used to be. No one likes the first working day of the week! But recently I got introduced to a ‘genuine’ (duh!) trouble of feeling terrible on Monday – now, it’s not Monday Blues anymore, it’s the swine flu!
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According to the statistics available online, government scientists call it the ‘Monday effect’. It clearly stands out on the chart showing the daily rate of consultations for members of the public who believe they may have the symptoms of swine flu is alarming on Mondays. On 27 July (Monday), for instance, nearly 80 consultations per 100,000 head of population were recorded, compared to just over 40 consultations per 100,000 for the Friday of the same week. But how many of these people really have swine flu is a different story. So, this is for the boss - you surely got to believe your subordinate on this one, at least for now.
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So, when you have no other choice but to settle down with that person’s ‘swine flu check’ message, you are all the more scared when he comes back the next day (to spread it…run.. run). One sneeze and you begin to dislike his presence so much more than hating his absence a day back. Still, how can you not fret over the fact that he had a blast of time somewhere when you had to work doubly hard…all thanks to the ‘swine flu scare’.
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Only yesterday, a friend called up to say that she had taken a rather long leave on the pretext of swine flu and needed my company, so what did I say? I said, I am not game for it and can’t be a party to something as ‘spineless’ as that! I mean for God’s sake stop using an epidemic to have an opportunity of evading a daily routine. Have we stooped to that low a level that instead of empathizing with someone who’s actually weathering the disease, we’ll take cues and enact the real-life situation as a rather shoddy drama?
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Guess, it’s time that we look for better excuses since not every time you can get away with something as ridiculous as that! Right?